Press Pause

Being single on my birthday is something that's very rare and now that my birthday is about a month away (I am an October child) I have been thinking about what it's like in the London dating scene. Thinking about all my past relationships is something I have been doing a lot lately; I have being dissecting every single thing that went wrong (I know that sounds a bit psycho)  just so I can prepare myself for the next one which I am thinking will be the one where I get to meet my soulmate (if you believe in such things) To be honest, I am constantly surrounded by friends who have kids or friends who have recently become engaged or are in full on relationships - which would make any normal human being feeling a little bit like a lemon amongst apples. I have read a couple of research which shows that a lot of people are really quite lonely and I do absolutely love spending alone times at the moment and I LOVE being selfish, having the freedom to do me and not having to consult a guy who in my case is a total control freak. I mean come on I am not a freaking damsel and I don't need you to save me all the time. 

Some men can be so forward and rude while apparently some of the nicer ones are way  too shy to approach girls because they're scared of being rejected. I am actually working on this thing were I had made a bet with someone to totally walk up to my dream guy (Thor or Chris Pine or Tom Hiddleston or Matt Smith aka the Eleventh Doctor) and ask them out. It would so funny if they and is a totally ballsy move. I wouldn't actually do this because I am not that ballsy, I am more of a shrinking violet when it comes to cute guys.

Don't get me wrong being in a relationship is fun and life fulfilling when it's with the right person. 

I am just having one of those late night thoughts that I wanted to rant about and what better place to express thoughts than on here. Maybe some of you might be in the same situation where you find dating a total waste of time because most of the men either want to have their cake and eat it or just want to go for someone who would boast their bruised ego.  

I really love the idea of having a relationship and dream of meeting my perfect half; at the moment though  don't really put myself put there plus I like finding myself again because being in and out of relationships I have kinda lost myself; as women, we tend to get full into a relationship while some men hardly ever lose themselves.  I feel when the times right I will meet my Mr Big one day preferably in the most romantic movie sorta way. I know I am a dreamer a side effect of watching too much Disney movies.